Proof:
I went to bed last night very late, completely upset. Lots of reasons and lots of things on my mind. Went through a few kleenex too while sopping up tears. And, my sleep was not restful. I probably only got about 2 hours of sleep total. When I woke up this morning? I remembered why I had gone to bed upset and my mood continued. It doesn't help that the weather is really crappy here right now too - lots of gloomy clouds, rain in the forecast, tornado watches here in Kansas (typical May weather).
I'm not the type of person that talks about things that are upsetting to me. I almost always have a smile on my face and I do NOT like to show other people that things are bothering me. I feel like a burden. I don't want people to know that I'm "normal". But you know what? I AM normal. I have bad days. I get lonely. Things bother me. My feelings get hurt. I'm just like you, probably. I won't go into WHY I was upset - this isn't Dr. Phil hour. But - down in the dumps. Worst feeling ever.
I didn't care if the Wicked Witch of the West herself dropped a tornado on me, I was going to get a ride in tonight. Not riding yesterday (on a planned ride day) was really tough. I missed a two hour window last night that I could've ridden - but I didn't take the risk because of the weather. Tonight though? Forget about it. I'm riding. Especially because I have some pent up frustration that I need to release.
Cue Operation Attitude Adjustment ride after work.
Like I mentioned above, the weather is pretty crappy here right now (in fact, we're in a tornado watch again tonight until 10 p.m.). I didn't really even think about the storms that rolled through two days ago and how the trail might be - I just set off. My mind was elsewhere. (I did remember to lube up and go to the bathroom pre-ride today though!! YAY me!).
The trail was wet, full of debris and MUDDY. SO MUCH MUD. There were times I probably should've just turned around because a couple of the places on the trail were so full of mud I could feel my bike and tires slipping. I didn't fall off though and navigated my way around despite the mess. The trail was closed in a different spot today so I had to take a road detour through a subdivision which was kind of a nice change of scenery.
The detour added an extra 1.3 miles to my ride tonight - and an unexpected hill which I took down with a fierce determination. Sit back in that saddle, girl. Pump your legs and pedal harder. Whew.
This was not a fast ride at all. My average speed was only 10.6 miles per hour because of all the mud and wet trail. That's okay though. Tonight wasn't about speed. Tonight was about clearing my mind of all of the emotions that had been riddling my body the past 24 hours. I had to worry more about navigating the trail tonight - which made the attitude I had earlier just kind of melt away. (Plus, I got to wear my new rain jacket tonight - so that was nice!)
I felt kind of bad for my poor girl though. She got muddy. Luckily I was able to wash her off at my brother's when I picked up my kiddo after the ride. I had to wait until I got home to clean myself up.
Sexy, huh?!? Pfft.
Here's my ride details:
https://www.strava.com/activities/56842939
Oh - and I started my new nutrition plan today. I made my favorite pancakes yesterday and put them in individual servings in the freezer so I can grab and go all week.
Here's the recipe if you're interested:
http://www.biggest-loser-recipes.com/oatmeal-pancakes.html
It makes enough for 5 servings (3 pancakes each serving). Breakfast for a week!
Picked up these goodies at the Farmers Market this weekend and spent yesterday afternoon also prepping and cooking them for the week.
And now that I'm home and clean and have 13.3 miles under my belt tonight? I'm much better. Not 100% but thankful that I got to get on my bike today.
Sometimes we feel alone. We feel lost. We're confused and hurt and angry and sad.
THIS is inspiration:
When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having, just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road, without thought on anything but the ride you are taking. ~ Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
PERSPECTIVE.
Thank you Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. I needed that.
The sun'll come out tomorrow! And there's more miles for me to ride.
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